Category: In Which We Mock Our Illness

I need to be at Big Barnes downtown by 7:30 on the very first day Highway 40 is closed. (Non St. Louisans – City Planners in their wisdom are closing all lanes of the major highway that cuts east/west. Major highway. MAJOR. Know as “Highway Farty” to residents, not because we’re being sarcastic but because…

Did you hear? December is National Hospital Visiting Month! DeNaHoMo ’07! Who’s with me? Today I again was back at Big Barnes – recommended by one in seven Republican presidential candidates. I was there for my final visit before being dosed with either the drug or placebo. (So close I can taste its sugary goodness.)…

Dear Ladies, I must say, if a person does have to wait four hours for an MRI, one could only wish for such a good group of eight fellow women to pass the time. I particularly liked it when we were comparing diseases and the Young Girl with the Rare Disease sighed, “My disease is…

Hey, do you know if you walk into the hospital and tell every one you meet during the registration and screening process that you don’t want Versed, at some point they will be gathered around you and chorus, “No, we are not giving you Versed!” So, I was convincing. Convincing enough the anesthesiologist recommended I…

Just a short update: The administrator for the clinical trial got on the phone and pushed my pancreas test from Friday to Tuesday. She kicks ass. She takes names. I don’t know what she does, but one call from her made an appointment magically open up, when I was told repeatedly the doctor only does…

So I sat down with the pancreas doctor. He began by asking, “So, what brings you here?” “I thought you had seen my CT scan.” “Well, I did, but I want you to tell me.” See, that’s not a good start. What does he think I’m going to say? Something that breaks the case wide…

I’ve been feeling a little under the weather MS-wise since I went off the Copaxone. It isn’t anything serious. When asked by the neurologist, I reported I felt like I was wearing a tight pair of knee socks all the time. Oh, and I had a Nerf football under my right ribcage. I’ve felt the…

As I understand it, the first version of the consent form for this clinical trial said “I will not have babies.” (Sign here.) The next version was more specific. The version after that says, “If you are a woman who can have children…you should use 2 forms of effective contraception simultaneously.” Ugh, I thought. I’m…

LOLPancreas Hai!I R in Ur AbdomensMaking U all worriedz. Oh NoesPancrees tests is hardDon’t knows till Caturday. (Ahahahahahah. CAT scan. I kill me.) (It occurs to me Mom now thinks she’s having a stroke.)

At first I thought, “Enh, they don’t want the details of my day at the hospital being tested to see if I am now well enough to be in the clinical trial.” But then who do I see visiting via a link that Andrea posted to Amanda’s blog? Many people. And I feel no hesitancy…