Category: In Which We Mock Our Illness

You need to do these things in this order to get your RSV shot. I believe I might have had RSV once, and it was so miserable that I obediently did all the steps below. They don’t know how long the the shot is good for. Two years at least, but maybe more.

I remember when my brother was first diagnosed as bipolar, he told my Mom he’d had a blood test that proved the diagnosis. She didn’t buy it and still stuck to her diagnosis, which was that he was just a jackass. Evidently there really is now a blood test for bipolar. Blood Test Could Speed…

Well, that was fast. I got the okay from TeddyJ to work from home in a week and a day. There will still be days I have to come in: once every few months, I believe. And if my absence will inconvenience anyone, like if they would need to schedule a special meeting room with…

I had several reasons for visiting the GP on Friday. The form, the prescription, and and the referral were easy. Regarding the libido, the doctor speculated that my thyroid might be off. She also mentioned my brother died recently. “Why would that make me horny?” I wondered, and some articles say it definitely does. You…

I got a call yesterday from the urgent care, saying that the pink pee culture came back as indeed a urinary tract infection. Not a typical infection, though, a special one. For this one was not caused by errant e-coli bacteria trekking on their own across Vagina Valley into my urethra, (not being transported there…

A few nights ago I did give Gary another chance for some digital spelunking in my woman cave, and it was very gratifying, even though I still had to argue with him about what muscles were where. Full disclosure. “I did give Gary another chance” above is inaccurate. Rather, read “I tearfully pled with Gary.”…

From the urologist: “We are currently recruiting patients for a clinical research study involving the implantation of a small neurotransmitter device to treat urge urinary incontinence.” It sounds like the nerves leading to your bladder just get a boost, so it would be helpful for neurogenic bladder like mine, where the issue is nerve conduction.…

I went in for a quick blood draw for the clinical trial and found they switched things up. Before, the real drug was the new formulation of Evusheld, and the placebo was the old-school Evusheld (the one useless against omicron), so they could show the increase in effectiveness. Evidently the government got involved and changed…

After three months of the oxybutynin, I give it a C minus. When I rely on it to give me total relief, it works quite well 50% of the time, while at the same time it only lets me digest the first 50% of lunch or dinner. I told the doctor I wanted to keep…

I get paid for this trial every time I visit the office, and I tell you, it makes me feel dirty. (Not so dirty that I’ll donate the money to a cause.) The researcher who presents the checks keeps assuring me that it is in compensation for my time, but I spent far more time…