I have delayed my yearly closet purge for five years now. Currently everything is on the bed, sorted into piles of:
Fit me (Headed for the front of my closet)
Don’t fit me yet (Will be waiting in the back of the closet)
Never will fit me — either too big or too small (Slated for donation)
Don’t fit me yet is by far the biggest pile.
There is also a sentimental value subset. My Empire Strikes Back shirt, my Triple Dipper shirt, and oddly, something I did not realize I have and have no memory of purchasing: an actual pair of Spanx.
Yesterday I sorted through my parents’ old files. I kept finding memories, plus new juicy family dirt, but nothing resembling a random pair of Spanx. (And, speaking of rando undies, not to worry, were I to buy Spanx it would be this very pair. I am confident they’re mine. I just have no memory of being uncomfortable in a pair of Spanx.)
4 responses to “Closet chaos”
This is fascinating because I could have sworn there was a discussion of shapewear on your blog/in your comments at one point, but: nope, search says no. Now where *was* that??? (there was a discussion of bra-ish things, but separately The Internet In Blog Form was how I learned that some shapewear has a “pee through the crotch hole” concept which is mildly horrifying to me on at least two levels: one, the potential for missing, and two, if you are not wearing anything between this and a dress, what happens if you have a spectacular fall-and-skid-down-the-stairs-and-your-dress-gets-hiked-up sort of accident? Just… full on, completely uncovered crotch exposed to the world???)
Okay, I was heretofore unaware of a pee-through crotch hole. ALL UNDERWEAR SHOULD HAVE THIS. Men have it. I imagine the lady version has a similar (yet roomier) gusset that one could spread by just pulling on the fabric. This is genius.
Aha; I was envisioning a… hole. A gusset you could really move out of the way, though, but then overlap again for “privacy” in case of catastrophic falls in which skirts get hiked up, would be vastly superior!
(does your Spanx have a gusset or a hole or neither, out of curiosity?)
KC – Neither!