Last night Gary andI were watching the Marvelous Mrs Maisel and bantering the way you do when Amy Sherman-Palladino’s cadence gets in your head, when he paused the television.
“I have to pee,” he said.
“I have to pee,” I said. “I call the nearest bathroom.”
“I have to pee more,” he said.
“Who has better bladder control,” I said, playing the MS card.
And thennnn thee conversation slooooowed down.
“Hey,” he said, hurt. “I clean up after myself.”
“Huh?”
“I try.” He frowned
“What are you talking about?” I said. I would have let it go, because I really did need to go, but he seemed hurt.
“I mean, every man leaves a little pee here and there, but I always clean up after.”
Turns out he thought I was slighting his aim or something when I entered into the bladder control competition.
6 responses to “Control”
There’s a bit of… anatomical distance… between bladder control and aim control. Poor dude.
(but: I am exceedingly pleased with him that he cleans up after himself! Excellent work, Gary!)(provided that is not imaginary; the “I clean up after myself two or three times per year, therefore I clean up after myself and you can’t complain” thing.)
Explore Sitzpinkler. German custom for men to sit when they pee. Prevents stray drips – but hard to convert non-Germans (speaking from experience here).
KC – no, he legitimately cleans up every time.
Big Dot – for a while I mistakenly believed he sat, partly because he is so clean.
That is truly impressive and also delightful! (I wish it were less normal for there to be such a large gap between perception-of-percentage-of-cleaning and actual-cleaning, but so it goes; also I remain perpetually grateful that my spouse sits, because it is SO NICE to just never have to deal with that.) Gary hereby wins some brownie points! Or would he, as he is working diligently to transform into a slug, prefer lettuce? 🙂
KC – your spouse was brought up well!
Honestly, he really *WAS* in so, so many ways! He’s a gem. (a human, flawed gem, but definitely a gem!)