Queen Mediocretia of Suburbia

Putting the TMI in absentminded

Month: November 2011

  • Things I Thought While I Was Awake

    Why do my legs ache when I’ve been in bed all day? Who cares if Mitt Romney is a Mormon? When sister in law Sandy went Muslim, a Muslim woman laughed at Wilma for believing that “Stupid story about Jesus rising from the dead.” How much more stupid is a story about talking stones and…

  • Dueling Diseases in the House

    We are both sick with different ailments. Gary is sick because he went to the dentist and foolishly elected against a root canal. Gary should get root canals as a preventative measure. He should get twice-yearly root canals. However, he is a Big Strong Man and the dentist went with it. Now he yelps and…

  • What Kind of Wood Doesn’t Float?

    Ah, that takes me back. Natalie Wood’s death is being re-investigated. A reminder if you forgot: Hart to Hart was the big show on TV in ’81, starring Stephanie Powers and Robert Wagner. Stephanie Powers was in a nine-year relationship with William Holden, and Robert Wagner was married to Natalie Wood. William Holden died accidentally…

  • The Dangers of Sleep

    Danger 1I’ve had more trouble than usual waking up the past few weeks. One morning I was sitting up, considering what to wear, when a big red dog plummeted from the ceiling, hit the floor, then ran away. (Given that it was a dog, I assume my troublesome ‘Dog’ neuron is acting up again.) It…

  • Gary on Sandusky

    Well! I heard those crickets in response to my expansive characterization of foster children as lying con artists. Today I was talking about Paula Poundstone and foster kids with my friend Kelly, who is a foster mom, and she responded smartly with something along the lines of “God! They are little liars! Especially the girls.”…

  • Paula Poundstone; In Which I Insult an Entire Community of Children

    A decade or so ago I heard on the news that Paula Poundstone had been arrested for drunk driving. “That’s weird,” I said to Mom, another Poundstone fan, “She just doesn’t seem like a drunk.” She answered, “She just adopted those foster kids, right?” “I think so. How weird is it that kids would get…

  • For the People who Can’t Go To Farmhaus

    No idea when we bought the dragonfly wind ornament that it was for the birds. Evidently we have a bird who enjoys working on her balance and core strength.

  • Farmhaus

    … Friday’s post was partly absorbed into the clouds, including the last line that said we’d be going to the Paula Poundstone concert later. Pretend you don’t know that. Assume for today we just went to dinner. First off, Farmhaus is a mere block from my Grandceils house, and if MoDot hadn’t jacked up Jamieson…

  • I Have Plans Again!

    Somehow, today has turned into a busy day. Bank and Post Office visits before noon. Then I must fit in a ritual watching of The Music Man before an early dinner at what is said to be The Best Restaraunt in Town, Farmhaus. The menu at Farmhaus is limited and random. From memory, it reads…

  • You Know What? I Believe Herman Cain.

    I truly believe he doesn’t remember saying or doing anything inappropriate to any of his accusers. Because he was hammered. The two incidents we know of happened after dinner. I think he gets drunk and acts like the Sex Machine To All The Chicks. (Cain! Can you dig it?)