A decade or so ago I heard on the news that Paula Poundstone had been arrested for drunk driving.
“That’s weird,” I said to Mom, another Poundstone fan, “She just doesn’t seem like a drunk.”
She answered, “She just adopted those foster kids, right?”
“I think so. How weird is it that kids would get on the phone and call the police because of a drunk driving incident?”
“It’s the foster kids. They are setting her up.”
Bear in mind, Mom worked with foster care children at the division of family services. I’m sure the well-adjusted foster children never demanded Mom’s attention. Still, it seems there were enough foster kids playing their foster parents for fools that Mom caught on to their games. She assured me foster children know how to scam the system, and they sometimes tell outrageous lies about their new parents.
At any rate, Paula Poundstone went to court ordered Alcoholics Anonymous and got her adopted foster children back. She continued to take in foster children, but sort of fell off the comedy map until Wait, Wait, Don’t Tell Me.
We saw her perform at the absurdly overheated Sheldon Concert Hall Saturday. She did allude to the drunk driving charge. (Her younger child and a Jewish friend ate saltines and grape juice and played “Passout.” “Mommy used to play Passout a lot.”)
She was funny, except she did go off on a long aside about how people keep trying to co-parent her oldest child who has mild cerebal palsy. This girl is now 20+ and is named Totia (Toe-shuh …spelling?) and is “a bit of a con artist.”
I didn’t know it at the time, but the drunk driving charge came up when the charge was dropped for ”’inappropriate touching” of one of Ms. Poundstone’s children, a 12-year-old girl.” Totia! And this is based on NOTHING but the smell test and Mom’s bias against foster children, but this Totia sounds like she overplayed her hand. Inapproriate touching? Isn’t that a Moms job?
Don’t fuck with Paula, child. She will get you twenty years later. She will expose you as the con artist you … might be.
3 responses to “Paula Poundstone; In Which I Insult an Entire Community of Children”
It may not show, but I’m still shocked by the craftiness (and not in the good way) of some people. The big stink here is about a cop who hurt his widdle pinky wif a mean ole staple gun – and received a complete disability pension. It turns out everytime there’s going to be a layoff, cops and fireman enter into hazardous situations. Obviously, all armed with staple guns. I hate those scammers.
Oh my gosh! I was also going to go to see PP, but for some reason it never came to be- I don’t have my act together these days. However, I’m convinced that if I had gotten them I would have run into at the door on the way in : )
Becs – That’s a shame. You know, I tried to track down one of those stories about those entrie towns who all commit insurance fraud, but I couldn’t find one. I know they’re out there.Rachel – I swear, I looked around for you!