GOP VERSUS GOP
I think a local cable station needs to broadcast political debates with a split screen live feed of Gary watching political debates.
Or, even better, it could be like VH1’s Pop-Up Videos (which I hear is coming back). Just little bubbles popping up during the debate, so you could still hear the audio. I was listening to Gary bellow so I missed many things during the GOP debate. (Michelle B. had 27 foster kids? Gays want to steal babies? What was that?)
This was Gary:
WHAT THE HELL? DO THEY THINK WE’RE STUPID?
NASA? NASA? NOT INNOVATIVE?
BUT IS IT EVEN GOOD PIZZA?
RIGHT TO WORK? YOU MEAN RIGHT TO NOT BE PAID?
NAZIS? MUSLIMS ARE NAZIS NOW?
I did hear Cain say, “No, I was talking about the BAD Muslims, the ones who want to kill us.” That just floored me. “No, I was talking about the BAD Asians, the ones who can’t drive.” Really? And then Gingrich, with “Well, you know, the bad Muslims lie.” (And I know, I know there are Bad Muslims. Just like there are Asians who can’t drive.)
DOG VERSUS DOG
In direct contrast to the debate, Gary has a plan for what will happen if Tinkerbell the DogSlut comes to live with us and Mac.
“I think muzzles would be a good idea. We put muzzles on both dogs, then when they fought, they’d be confused. They’d just bump heads with each other.” And then chew you to death in your sleep, Gary.
13 responses to “Gary Was In Fine Form Tonight”
I still don’t know how you stand it.
So my dog isn’t a biter, when he finds a dog he wants to intimidate he pokes them with his nose. Hard. HARD. I’ve been poked and I don’t know how he doesn’t hurt his nose but other dogs are not amused. Maybe he can teach Mac this trick…
Becs – because he’s so sweet. If he were essentially a jerk I couldn’t. Amy in StL – Mac would teach your dog how to bare his teeth and shake his face in an intimidating way in return.
Queen – Ah well, then. That makes all the difference. I wish you would show more of the sweetness.
I met Gary for long enough to form a positive opinion. The parts where you want to keep him around are good, but they’re not *funny*.
I am also impossible to watch television with.
Becs, I can vouch for Gary. For all his quirks and blog-worthy actions, he is a good man who treats Ellen – and her friends – very, very well.
Becs – Isn’t it sweet he doesn’t want the dogs to bite each other? I think that’s very sweet!Tami – When people meet him they are always a little surprised he isn’t an ogre. Hattie – Evidently I’m impossible to watch tv movies with. I always want to back up and repeat things.Caroline – What? What has he ever done for you? You all gave him that pie and cake when Mom was dying.
I can’t work out who’s talking about the dog, and who’s discussing Gary.
Big Dot – add to that that Gary has taken to calling me like a dog. And it’s all about Gary. Macs a little bastard.
How many times has he cleared out of the house for us to have a girls night or run an errand to pick up one forgotten item and brought 10 things for us because he thought we might like them?
I never thought that Gary was an ogre, but maybe that’s because I also am in the habit of only mentioning the things about people that are funny, so I assume that good stuff is in the background. Seriously, when your biggest complaint is that someone is too kind to an animal? Not a bad guy.
Caroline – Ah, I forgot the ten types of Cheetoes …Tami – Exactly! Its like the opposite of damned by faint praise. Flattered by faint criticism?