A few things I learned at the Conservabration:
1. When it comes to Graquel’s taste in music, I do not like Incubus but I went out and bought a Crossfade CD based on two songs she plugged into my head from her iPod.
2. Bourbon? A waste of time. I drank several ounces of fancy bourbon (Single barrel? Does this mean anything to anyone?) and it did nothing but instantly give me a headache. I didn’t even register on the Breathalyzer. Does Single Barrel mean alcohol free?
3. Sleep eating is perhaps the funniest sleep disorder ever, especially when the sleep eater is describing the detritus left on the floor by the bed after the sleep buffet.
4. People can be scary when they are drunk and get RIGHT IN YOUR FACE to let you know they make charitable contributions.
5. Conservatives have more faith in humanity than I have. I still don’t think individual people would give as generously and even-handedly as the goverment.
6. Areas of agreement: George Bush is a moron. Bill Clinton also in many ways a moron. Both too much in love with their penises.
7. I am the only one who thinks artists who get grants from the NEA should have more sense than to insult their patron, the government. Everyone else is all “Oooo, art should never be censored.” Well, fine, but a little self-censorship? A little common sense?
8. Our black conservative said “Okay, well I’m worried that someone will shoot Barak Obama too, but if that’s what it takes then so be it.” Actually, I think what she said was “so be it, baby,” but she was drunk.
7 responses to “Things I Learned at The Girl’s Night Out”
#4. Very funny…felt sorta sorry for you as I witnessed it happening and did nothing. You seemed to be handling it despite the very wide eyes,smirky smile, and general expression of disbelief/amusment. #7. I did not agree with the general crowd. I believe there should be some censorship, even if can only be in the form of common decency.I had a ton of fun…always wonderful to hang with the gang for a night. Thank you Marcia!
I’m with you on #7. I still don’t understand the artistry of piss.
Catherine – I was a little afraid she would grab my boobs.Caroline – Oh, I understand the artistry of piss, I just think you shouldn’t piss on the flag IF the ‘gubment is funding it. It was a crucifix in piss though, right? That’s okay. Now, if the church was funding Piss Crucifixes (Pisscifixes?) then pissing on a crucifix would be stupid.
Queen, had she grabbed you, you might have bared them for show and tell..come on, admit it! I won’t be jealous, promise!
She did bare an armpit. I was impressed by the waxy smoothness of it. I thought of it as I shaved mine this morning.
I believe it was Robert Mapplethorpe who did the crucifix and it was splashed with piss. Note this is almost a western interpretation of the Danish Allah cartoon sans the National Endowment for the Arts. I do agree that you should not pee on the hand that subsidizes your personal form of expression.
“almost a western interpretation of the Danish Allah cartoon”- I take it you mean the Danish Muhammad cartoon. (You can draw cartoons of Allah.) I’m with you on the “almost” – now if there was a part of the Bible that said “And it is strictly prohibited to piss on the crucifix! No Pissifixing! Ever!” then it would be just like the Muhammad cartoon.