I understand the neurologist needs to track all the side effects of my very effective MS drug. Hence, the bonus annual dermatologist visit and the twice-yearly ophthalmologist visit. I get it. Really, I do.
I visited the ophthalmologist in the summer, where we got a baseline reading for my visual field with the most enjoyable of all vision tests, the one that plays like a video game where you click once for every flashy light.
At that visit, I was told to return in six months to look for any decline, which I did, only to find the flashy video game was broken, and I rescheduled the next appointment due to The Crud, and then finally got my second test to see if I was in decline.
The doctor said, ”So, this visit today was your baseline –”
I said, “No, the visit in the summer was my baseline — “
”Well, it would have been, but we messed it up,” she said. “We didn’t look at the edges of the field, just the center. But the good news is that today’s baseline shows you have an excellent field of vision, couldn’t be better, so you clearly aren’t in decline. So maybe we’ll just call you in … say … ten months for your next appointment.”
Sure, I said, then later I thought about how the neurologist insisted I set an appointment to see the dermatologist every year even though the skin doctor thought that was crazy. I’ll be seeing her again in six months whether she likes it or not.
I know it sounds like I’m being too precious about my health. I hear the inner voice that says I shouldn’t cater to my body. It is loud.
Perhaps that’s why Gary now stubbornly insists his skin problem is “just psoriatic arthritis.” He doesn’t want to cater to any worse problems his body might come up with. I get how he feels. He feels that it’s weak and pitiful to care about himself.
2 responses to “Transparency in doctors”
… yeah. For me, the main questions are “what might go wrong if I don’t have this check as frequently and how bad is it?” and losing an area within your field of vision is a reasonably large thing to go wrong (but also either 6 or 12 months is normal for field of vision testing?). The other question is basically “what other benefits can this appointment provide?” which increases when there are things I want to ask about that I wouldn’t schedule an appointment (“is there a solution for [annoying problem] or do I just have to live with it?”). I don’t know what issue the dermatologist is checking for, but: sticking with what was recommended seems Sensible and Responsible to me, unless the weight of appointments crowds it down to a different status.
You’re worth taking care of (as is, presumably, Gary, although I’m taking that somewhat more on faith), but also I am familiar with feeling as though everyone *else* deserves [thing] but maybe not me, at least not if I’m the one deciding if I deserve [thing].
The semi-superstitious wish to pretend health things or side effects or progression will not happen is, for me, separate but familiar as well.
Anyway! Keep on perplexing that dermatologist and/or find a new one who won’t be perplexed! 🙂
KC – I don’t know that Gary shares the feeling that he doesn’t deserve medical attention. His ego is so big that I think he feels his case is so special that doctors cannot comprehend it.