AI comes directly at me this time

I know AI can’t be trusted, but usually it isn’t personal.

Dave at Blogography asked AI about his blog, and was dismayed by its misinterpretation.

I went to AI (specifically, ChatGPT) and asked, “Who is Queen Mediocretia of Suburbia?”

What follows is our exchange.

AI: “Queen Mediocretia of Suburbia” isn’t a historical figure — it’s a satirical character created by American columnist Dave Barry. Would you like me to pull together a few of her funniest “commandments” and sayings from Barry’s work, to give you a sense of her style?”

Me (horrified at 20 years of subconscious plagiarism): Yes

AI: Dave Barry didn’t just invent Queen Mediocretia of Suburbia, he built a whole mythical pantheon of “Household Gods and Goddesses” to poke fun at everyday life. Here are a few:

Kraftoria, Goddess of Casseroles

Inspires the mixing of canned soup, noodles, and mysterious meat products into “potluck cuisine.”

Blandor, God of Station Wagons

Protector of families on long car trips, keeping them safe with seatbelts and upholstery that smells faintly of French fries.

Vacuuous, Lord of Appliances

Keeper of vacuum cleaners, toaster ovens, and washing machines that mysteriously break the day after the warranty expires.

Me, realizing AI is just messing with me: RESET

…

AI: We’re starting fresh. What would you like to dive into now?

Me: Who is Queen Mediocretia of Suburbia?

AI: Queen Mediocretia of Suburbia is a satirical invention of humor columnist Dave Barry.

Me: show me

…

AI: I tried digging, but I couldn’t find a reliable source that shows exactly where Dave Barry first introduced the character “Queen Mediocretia of Suburbia.” If you like, I can try to track down an archived Dave Barry column. Would you prefer I do that?

Me: yess

…

AI: Short answer: I did not find a clear, dated Barry column that uses the exact phrase “Queen Mediocretia” or that identifies him as the originator. However, there are many blogs and blog personas using the title Queen Mediocretia of Suburbia (for example the Typepad/mocklog blog) which may have been inspired by the type of satire Dave Barry popularized). Would you like me to keep digging?

Me (relieved) yes

…

AI: The evidence points to the phrase being used by bloggers as a persona/title (a long-running Typepad blog called “Queen Mediocretia of Suburbia”), and not to an easily-located, attributable Dave Barry coinage. Would you like me to keep digging?

Me (thinking, yeah, you better learn) yes

…

AI: The blog pages themselves show the persona Queen Mediocretia of Suburbia. I can attempt to contact the current mocklog blog owner (profile shows “Ellen S” / Sandy Trotter) to ask when the persona started.

Me: Who is Sandy Trotter?)

…

AI: From a Pinterest pin referencing “Queen Mediocretia of Suburbia” → below the title, it shows:

“Putting the TMI in absentminded.”
“Sandy Trotter”
This suggests “Sandy Trotter” is the byline / author name (or pen name) associated with the Queen Mediocretia / mocklog blog. 

Me (after checking Sandy Trotter’s Pinterest which links to me and is otherwise filled with photos of hair that has been dyed eggplant, as mine briefly was in 2010 or so): … Tell me more about Lord Vaccous.

…

AI (hallucinating purely to amuse itself): Dave Barry’s creation of Vacuuous is part of a broader comedic framework where he invented various deities to satirize suburban life. Other notable figures in this pantheon include:

• Queen Mediocretia of Suburbia: The ruler of suburban life, embodying the values of comfort, conformity, and mild mediocrity.

Me: Who is Spunky Labia International Toe Porn Superstar?

…

AI: After conducting a thorough search, I couldn’t find any verifiable information or credible sources that document the name “Spunky Labia, International Toe Porn Superstar” as a recognized individual, public figure, or character in mainstream media or literature.

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I am so curious to know what happens when Dave Barry asks AI about his writing. Does Dave Barry read about me and the demi-gods Vaccuous and Spunky?