Words with Husbands

A few days ago Gary called to me from the shower. “You have to hear this!”

I was applauding as the dog moved his bowels in the backyard, and I didn’t want to divide my attentions, so I ignored Gary. But, what he wanted me to hear was a sentence he just thought out in the shower that was so graceful and acticulate he was astonished. It is lost forever now, but supposedly it was art.

I can attest that from the very beginning of this headache he’s been more verbally equipped than usual. Every word he needs is right on the tip of his tongue. He pulled “occipital” out of his poor brain in the ER.

I somehow think that’s a clue. Some wordy brain lobe is getting more stimulation because his eyes are getting less. It’s like the sterotype that the blind develop extra power in their remaining senses, only Gary has increased verbal abilities.

We did go to the opthamologist today, and we are both relieved to hear his actual eyeballs and blood flow and eye nerves are okay. The doctor did have to climb up into Gary’s face through the pupils wearing a bright scope. Somehow, that didn’t make him as nauseated as the nurse shining the handheld eye scope at him.

After, we had quite the nice chat about Christmas and fingerling bananas and sabotage until he fell asleep at 7:30. He wasn’t even up to on-line shopping. Let me tell you, some in-laws are getting crap presents this Christmas.

Another on-line shopping problem was with the wrap-around sunglasses. It seems if you wear them in front of Gary’s giant pc monitor, the screen becomes invisible. I am not making this up. You must tilt your head at a very particular angle to see the colors on the screen. Bob your head even a little and the screen fades to grey.

Gary was relieved to find that I saw it too, since he was worried he had some rare form of PC monitor-blindness.