Queen Mediocretia of Suburbia

Putting the TMI in absentminded

Month: June 2011

  • Dan Rather

    I feel a kinship with Dan Rather. He might even be kin: we were both born in Texas. He was the national network news voice when there was one half hour of news a day. I felt some pity for Walter Cronkite because he turned the reins over to Dan what, a month before Hinckley…

  • Foul Mood

    Last night I was in bed at seven then awake till two for no reason. That’s why I didn’t wake up today until eight when the dog sat on my chest and clawed at my head. He HAD food, he HAD toys, he had Whole House Access. So, then, I was going to get ready…

  • What’s do you call a guy with no arms and no legs and no tongue hanging on the wall?

    I am stupidly happy about the return of Louie on FX. And it is wrong, because it is so wrong to laugh at his show. Especially this one bit … This bit about child molesters … Well, I can’t find it anywhere. It was a bit he did on how pedophiles always end up killing…

  • “The Die is Cast” — Urine edition

    We went out to breakfast, and in the parking lot Gary called his Mom to alert her that after we picked up a few items for her at the grocery, then we’d be over. While driving to get the bananas and skim milk, I asked, “I have a shopping list right here of about ten…

  • UPDATED: Unsatisfying Dreams

    Thursday Night I had a sex dream. In this sex dream I masturbated. With a woman. It was not a good dream. For ME. I’m sure if anyone else had been watching HE would have enjoyed it, but a sex dream in which you don’t have any SEX is unsatisfying. I woke Gary up and…

  • Baked creamy rice pudding Recipe

    From the BBC. (This recipe is for four -five people eating rice puddings out of ramekins. I’d cut this in half, at least, for two people and eat it out of cereal bowls.) metric / the right way 110g / 1/2 cup short-grain pudding rice (Arborio rice) 450ml / ¾ pint single cream 450ml /…

  • Why is someone this TALL employed as concert security?

  • Rice Pudding

    At 5:00 pm: I reminded myself I had to buy a few items on the way home. “Gas, pills, rice.” Got the gas, and I was at the pharmacy waiting for the pills when I decided I wasn’t going to get the rice. No rice pudding tonight. At 5:25 pm: I was still at the…

  • In Which I Abuse My Friendship With Beleaguered Friend #3

    I had an earwig today. I couldn’t place it. It was an overdriven guitar intro. I told Gary I needed to go home and play it on my bass to get it out of my head. I was under the impression it was “Kashmir.” Got home, listened to Kashmir. Kashmir goes: “Babdadum, badadum; badadum, badadum:…

  • Bread and Circuses

    I saw an ad the other day for a new show called “Mob Wives.” I sniffed, “Why. Why would anyone watch that show?” Then I flipped on the Casey Anthony trial. So now … I have to rationalize my contempt of reality shows with my fixation on the Casey Anthony Trial. See Casey Anthony (watch…