Queen Mediocretia of Suburbia

Putting the TMI in absentminded

Month: September 2010

  • My Inner Self

    Time: Last Week Scene: A swimming pool with a domed deep pink roof and curved deep pink walls. Welcome to my bladder. Swimming in my bladder are some E-Coli bacteria and “innumerable” white blood cells. One E-Coli says to another, “Do I know you?” “Perhaps. Are you from the Old Country?” “Belarus? No. You?” “Oh,…

  • Call Me Tantalus: Medical Edition

    The punishments of Tantalus in Hades were: 1) To stand chin-deep in water, which would drain away when he tried to drink. 2) To have a rock suspended over his head, and 3) To have grapes and fruit overhead, but if he tried to reach for it, it would be lifted up by the wind.…

  • No News is Bad News?

    The story: The nut job pastor in Florida who wants to have a Koran bonfire on 9/11. “Who?” Foreign Dots may be puzzled. The Korean Dot says, “누구지?” Really, I hope this story hasn’t spread to other countries. If you haven’t heard the story, I could fill you in. I could link you to Yahoo,…

  • In Answer to Everyone…

    Yes! I know Barenaked Ladies is coming to Saint Louis. Squee! They’ll be at the Pageant 11/7/2010. Seriously, get tickets. And say hi if you see me in line at the Pageant at 5:00 pm Friday. Granted, I’ll have seen them a week earlier in Albuquerque when I go there to visit my brother. I…

  • Why Gary Isn’t a Mom

    This weekend, Gary and I were shopping at Best Buy. Well, I was sitting on a comfy chair watching the giant TV and Gary was using the restroom. I looked up from the comfy chair and saw he was standing there. He looked stricken. “Gary?” “There was a little girl!” he whispered, “In the men’s…

  • Labor Day

    Well, here’s another take on Labor Day. For all you bloggers out there moaning the demise of summer, I say, “Thank you Persephone for your return to Hades. Don’t let the screen door hit your ass on the way out.” Goodbye, weeds. This weekend was the first all summer it has been cool enough to…

  • Wine Part 2, Cheese Part 2

    Wine In a Tree Grows in Brooklyn, a little girl gets a cup of coffee so she can smell it, but she doesn’t like the taste. This is how I feel about wine. If only it tasted as good as it smells. You know that whole ritual they say you should go through at a…

  • Like Eat, Pray, Love. Only Without Any Praying. And the Loving Isn’t That Big a Deal Either.

    Like Eat, Pray, Love. Only Without Any Praying. And the Loving Isn’t That Big a Deal Either.

    I am making a list of what I need to eat while in Paris. Macaron. I must have a macaron or the Paris Breakfasts blogger AND Rick Steves might hunt me down. (Oh, and lately Rick Steves is referred to with any random two first names. “So, what does Mike James say … Ed Brians…

  • Stuff in Paris Hilton’s “Friend’s” Purse

    Paris Hilton claims that the purse containing cocaine that led to her Friday night arrest in Las Vegas does not belong to her, entertainment website TMZ reported Saturday. [Regarding the ‘bindle’ of cocaine] “She had not seen it but now thought it was gum.” Paris’ friend’s purse: In purse: 1. ‘Bindle’ of coke (That does…

  • James Lee: Best O’ The Manifesto

    This is the man who held three people hostage at the Discovery Channel’s headquarters. (It was BREAKING NEWS Wednesday afternoon.) I saw this face and I thought, Neh, he’s not crazy. Now, I’m going back and forth. Crazy:Doesn’t love the Discovery Channel. Dirty Jobs! Mythbusters! What’s not to love? Not Crazy: Only has two “first”…