Orange Death

Lounging in bed, watching the Daily Show, start to choke. Choking makes me cough. Coughing makes me pee. Peeing doesn’t make me puke, but something does, and I just barely make it to the bathroom in time.

I don’t think Jon Stewart’s goatee made me puke, I think it was the orange juice. Looking back at the last three times I’ve gotten sick, orange juice played a part. I was blaming the Filet-o-Fish and the Grits Benedict, but they were both paired with OJ.

I drink orange juice, then an hour later an orange juice bomb explodes inside and squirts out all of my cavities.

Now that I think about it … in the last 36 hours I’ve had two mugs at home and a 12 oz smoothie at work. Sooooo maybe my limit is something less than … one ounce of orange juice per HOUR.