At the table: Friends 2-4. And me. I didn’t say much, though.
The topic: How would Gary act if he and I had a baby?
“Well, he’d argue with you about everything.”
“Like. ‘Ellen! You aren’t supposed to puke that way. Here, this is how you puke.’”
“And he’d buy all the books and be The Expert on Everything.”
“And argue with the doctor. And tell you how to breastfeed.”
“You know he’d feed the baby leftovers.”
“No, he’d go on a baby-food diet and only eat what the baby eats.”
“No, he’d masticate the food like a herring gull and regurgitate it for the baby.”
“In a cone shape.”
7 responses to “Tuesday Lunch Conversation”
You left off the idea of competitive weight gain (and loss).Heaven help the day care providers.
We didn’t even discuss growth charts.
That’s hilarious. I’m guessing my aunts had a very similar discussion about my dad when they found out my mom was pregnant with me. Except it probably revolved around my dad’s hyphochondria and weird health rituals. Aaaand they were right.
The crib would be finished when the baby turned one. You would take many photos of the unfinished crib and post them here.
Hot Mom – Day car providers would be given the same treatment as Doggy Day Care / Boarding providers. The food would be pied out and put in baggies with instructions, and I would roll my eyes like I do when Gary spells out how the food should be plated.Caroline – Mac has been getting a lot of “Mac, you are FAT” chat lately. We’d be getting that baby fat off that baby.Amy_in_StL – Was he afraid you’d make him sick, or that you’d be sick?Tami – Ha! That’s so true.
Both really. When I was a couple months old I got heat rash, in early spring because I was wrapped in so much clothing so I didn’t get a draft. Every time I got sick my dad was convinced it was something serious; luckily I was a pretty healthy infant. When I was teething, my dad was convinced I’d caught the flu (fever, trouble sleeping) and he came down with it too. He did the same thing when I got my first serious menstrual cramps; he was convinced I had stomach flu and he came down with it. (I was too shy to tell him it was my period)
Amy_in_StL -Ohhhhh, the poor MAN, to try to follow cramps with a mere stomach flu!