Here is how Gary has said goodbye to me every day the past decade:
“Bye hon. Don’t forget to feed the dog.”
Sometimes it makes me want to not feed the dog. But I don’t dare, because when he comes home he often says:
“Hi hon. The dog didn’t eat all his food! You didn’t make it right.”
In the past the dogs ate dry food and it was easy, but now that the other, sickly dog is gone (Douglas, R.I.P.), McDonnell the healthy dog gets tasty canned food.
Originally, we just plunked down some of the Science Diet Doug was on at the end.
Now, Mac has conned Gary into making ever-increasingly ornate dog menus to tempt his palate. If Gary spots Mac hasn’t had all his food, he coaches me on the recipe.
“You know he likes it chopped up into little chucks, not crumbs, but little bite sizes. And he likes it on the big plate …”
(Yeah, we’re just moving right past that.)
“…not on the lunch plate. And he likes it stacked in a little mound, with different layers, like a Tower of Treats. First he likes the Science Diet piled up, with the Mighty Dog drizzled over the top. Sometimes you mix them together, and he doesn’t like that.”
And what else? Maybe a little parsley on the side? Some Haricot Vert?
13 responses to “Nouvelle Cuisine”
When my last dog was sick, so so sick, I laid next to her on the floor and fed her white rice from a spoon. It was very pathetic. I had a six week old baby and it was a damn good thing he was an easy baby because I was busy with saving the dog.Now? With the new puppy? I love him dearly, but Am Starting Fresh! He gets his food dry, baby. Also he gets it when I’m damn good and ready to feed him. 🙂
Maybe it’s just because I’m in an extra cranky mood lately, but that seems like a passive-aggressive thing that Gary is doing to you.Tell him you’re not feeding the dog anymore. You can go as far as offering to put down the bowl that HE has prepared the night before, when you leave for the morning. But jeez, to complain about not making the food right for the dog?!
It’s understandable to adore your dog, but gosh, there seems to be an inappropriate attachment issue of some sort going on here. Not that I am a psychologist or anything…
Wow. I see a future where Gary feeds the dog. All the time.We have lots of critters and always have. Our vet says dry is better for their teeth. Also, the recalls have been mainly (totally?) for wet varieties. Not that a moist tidbit now and again wouldn’t sound more yummy to ME…Maybe Gary needs to be re-trained. 🙂
*blushing guiltily* I probably do this sort of thing to my SO with regard to the dog. I spoiled my dog and now she won’t eat unless it is served up just so. Nothing he does quite lives up to my expectations. He is sort of a saint. Probably you are too.
What if you feed the dog a very tiny amount of dry – he’ll be so hungry he’ll eat whatever’s there. and then Gary will be impressed that you did it right because when he gets home it’ll be All Gone! My dogs went to live with my grandmother when I moved away, and when the older one’s teeth started falling out, dinner became a whole production of dry food, hot water, microwave, canned food “for flavor”, so she could gum it down. But the other, younger dog was impressed, shoved her aside, ate her meal, returned to his “Weight Watchers” dry kibble, and ate that, too. Every time. She wasted away and he looks like a coffee table. Did it occur to my grandmother to change the process? Not once. And don’t get me started on these cats I sit for occasionally. Their three meals a day are a nine-step process.
My dogs are spoiled in many ways, but food is not one of them. They’ve gotten dry food all their lives, and they think it is the height of gourmet dining when I pour a little room-temperature water on it.
Hungry dogs will eat most anything, including used tissue and the insoles of your shoes. Even with a health problem, feeding a good basic diet is usually enough.Sometimes dogs don’t eat all their food because they get too much. They may also be nibblers (my last dog was like that — she ate a little at night and then ate the rest for breakfast).Yes, I have fussed over food for a sick animal, and I am about to have to do some fussing for my newly diagnosed diabetic cat (she needs a higher protein food that’s kind of pricy, so the other 5 will get cheapo canned food when she gets hers).And, yah, unless the creature has a problem drinking or won’t drink water, dry food is preferable for the toofies.I think you are a candidate for sainthood, myself. I really, honestly hope the G-man is exaggerated for humor. Let HIM feed the dog.
Mea Culpa on giving you the leftover Mighty Dog.If it makes you feel any better, Picky Ricky is making me cook up some concoction so he’ll eat his prescription food. Old Man Ricky’s Kidney Stone Busting Dog Stew1/2 c dry prescription dog food1/4 Wolfgang Puck chicken broth1/3 can of wet prescription dog foodMicrowave for 30 seconds and voila! The dog eats.
Jenny – For quite some time we gave Mac dry food, except we just left the bowl out at all times. He liked to eat at midnight. This led to a daily 1 am visit to the backyard. Man, was he pissed when we took that bowl up.Becs – Hey, who do you think feeds the dog at night? Mr. Gary. You inspired me to pickup the plate tonight and say “You must have made it wrong! He barely ate!”Rhea – It’s healthy if you consider we could be treating children this way.Sue – I can’t train Gary. He is untrainable. I’m always baffled when I hear men say, “my wife won’t let me -” I leap in and grab them and shake them and scream “How? How do they have this control over you? Tell me!”Zayrina – Don’t feel guilty. Like Gary, you probably have qualities that make your demands worth it!Taster – The dog would inform on me. I truly believe one day the dog would pace between the dry and the wet dog foods and look accusingly at me, and Gary would catch on.Jammies – But, will they eat without the water? That’s when they start to take over.Sherri – This is when I call upon friends and family to testify that Gary is in no way exaggerated.Friend #3 – Where’s the white rice? Jenny’s dog got white rice. From a spoon! You are cruel!
Yes, they will still eat the food when I forget the water. Each of them is afraid that the other one will get his food. That may be why your dog is being picky–he can afford to be, now that there is no competition for dinner.
I second Sue…
Jammies – that is an excellent point. Doug always ate first, and Mac would have to wait. Personally, I think he just needs one meal a day. Autumn and Sue – again, I could give him all kinds of positive reinforcement, but how could I punish Gary? He’s so cute.