Fail of the Week


After four and a half days of six hour-long meetings with minimal breaks, I developed a sore on my rear.

(Allow me to pause while I compile a list of delicate terms for my hindquarters.)

It was located in a spot where I couldn’t see it unless I … repositioned some of the flesh padding my tailbone.. I couldn’t use a mirror because I would have need several tilted mirrors reflecting each other like the inside of a periscope.

I did all of this during the lunch break. At one point, Gary yelled through the bathroom door that there were a lot of butt pillows at his parent’s house, and he could pick one up. I came out of the bathroom to say no, not that big of a deal, probably just a pimple or infected hair or something.

And then faintly, from my room I could hear “Oh it’s Ellen.” “Ellen! Mute!” “Somebody mute her!” Yes, I had neglected to mute when I went to lunch, I just shut off my camera, and about five coworkers decided to skip lunch or came back early and keep working while some people with work-life balance and sore bottoms had husbands yelling at them about butt pillows.

I apologized and one person said, it was okay, they all understand, (unspoken: because they have children) and then muted myself for the entire rest of the day.


2 responses to “Fail of the Week”

  1. KC – I have decided my posterior is a recurrence of annular eczema, which I’ve had before. I’m ignoring it for a week.

Comment, even if you aren't on WordPress. Make up a name. Fine by me.

Discover more from Queen Mediocretia of Suburbia

Subscribe now to keep reading and get access to the full archive.

Continue reading