I sat in a group of four people. One was twisting and writhing and complaining he couldn’t “crack” his back.
“I’ve never done that,” I said. “Never cracked my back. Never cracked my knuckles.”
I was expecting – I don’t know. Acclaim? Envy? What I got was a horrified pause, and then “What … what did you say?”
“I’ve never cracked my back or my knuckles.”
“OH! I thought you said NIPPLES.”
Now, this guy is in his 20s, and I could have just written it off as juvenile behavior, especially when his equally young friend agreed, “Yeah, that’s what I heard too.”
Then a woman my age said, “Oh. I did think that was unusual.”
And then Friend #3 piled on and said, “I definitely heard you say you’d never cracked your nipples. Four of us heard it.”
“Well, you are all wrong. Why would I say something like that … well, okay, obviously, you know me, clearly I’d say something like that, but I DIDN’T.”
Then I spent the rest of the day eNUNciating and Ar-TIC-u-lating.