Spunky Labia, the beautiful and enigmatic International Toe Porn Superstar, is shown here without makeup and alongside her less attractive twin, Lumpy Labia:
The varicose veins began on my right side a few years ago, and now they have begun on my right foot. The left side is still in good shape. Spunky says desparately, “It’s okay! I’ll only expose my left profile to the cameras! Still love me!”
But of course, now that I’ve lost 38.5 pounds, the fat melts away to reveal the lumpy veins below. I’ve lost inches as well as weight. Still, I didn’t expect to lose one inch in height as well. I was kissing Gary this week and I thought, “When did kissing him get this awkward?” Somehow he got tall. In the past, we kissed and we were nose to nose.
Now I have to tilt my head. It was quite odd, and I didn’t like it as much as you’d think. I tried to close my eyes and imagine I was kissing some new man, but I couldn’t get into it without a backstory.
I just meaured myself and I am one inch shorter. My pants still are the same length, so I must have lost torso height. I did go down a slide at the City Museum last weekend and I landed hard on my tailbone; perhaps my spine is now compressed.
Of course, the reason isn’t that complex: I’m just old. I hit 53 and my body said, “It’s time to start looking like an old lady. Catch up.”
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UPDATE: Gary and I kissed this morning. He said, “You’re tall again.” He was disappointed. We measured me and I am indeed back to 5’7″.
Judge for yourself. Could this slide ride have compressed my spine?
7 responses to “UPDATED:The Return of Spunky Labia, International Toe Porn Superstar, and Her Evil Twin”
Wow! Congratulations on the weight loss. You’re doing it right. What do you think makes the biggest difference?
I have lost almost 2 inches in height since college (and I don’t have that many to lose) but I don’t mind because I seem to have a lot less trouble with my back, too. Maybe compression makes it a little harder for stuff to slip out of place. Nature gives a little as she takes a little.
Cripes, I’m so short-waisted, if I lose any torso inches my boobs will be perched directly on top of my butt. Still facing the other way, presumably. I wish I’d never gone down this road.
I have been a nurse near 25 years and I am 3 years older and a great deal fatter but don’t have veins like that. I wear compression stockings. Have my whole career and they have saved my viens. Get some.
I still haz a tall though.
~~Silk – exercise. Seems to be the secret for me. I’ve hit a plateau though. I need to crack the exercise up a notch. Allison – every time I adjust my bra straps I think “Gotta ratchet up the boobs” and I picture a mechanical ratcheting sound. Zayrina – You have a tail? What?
TALL! I have not yet shrunk as the crone takes over and settles in.
The delights of aging are many. And this is just the beginning for you!
Zayrina – Ooooh … tall!
Hattie – All I want is few more years of not peeing myself.