Einsparungen-Armen

Einsparungen-Armen is the German translation of “savings-poor,” and I’m making it it into one of those specific German words that mean things like “the sensation of needing to use the restroom right after you used the restroom” and “moral judgements of others based in the ecstasy of self-righteousness” and “the type of person who learns to cook late late in life and refuses to measure anything.” I don’t know what those German words are but I’m sure they’re out there.

At any rate I am seriously einsprungen-armen. This last month I realized if I take the tax refund and a few miscellaneous checks and put it all in one savings account that it will make a nice round number.

I want my rainy day savings fund to be round and proud and untouched (much like me) and if it means I don’t pay my house insurance bill then so be it.

I am truly thinking stupid things like, “I can’t buy those pre-sliced onions; I have no money.” And I have “no money” because that’s the only way I can get that round number.

If it weren’t for the damn house insurance I’d have those zeros at the end of my savings number. Hey, I wonder if I can put the insurance bill on the credit card? That way I could have the zeros for two whole weeks.