“Don’t tell anyone you don’t like beer,” Gary said. We were walking into Anheuser-Busch to take the Brewmaster brewery tour.
Minutes later, everyone in the tour group was asked to name two favorite beers. While waiting my turn I crafted a response about the AB heritage in Saint Louis and my Dad and how he had us serve him everything on those round beer trays and in the meantime Gary stuttered out “I uh – I don’t really like beer! ”
It’s possible my dislike of beer began early, when I went on a school trip to the brewery. I think I was in grade school. What I remember was walking on a catwalk, and seeing a man test the product in an open foamy vat that stank of beer.
The catwalk is still there, but there’s no smell anymore, unless you count the lovely smell of whatever they use to power wash the floors.
We tasted the beer the first time while it was being beechwood aged (yes, they throw actual wood in the vats so the yeast has something to adhere to). That dose of beer was vile. It was 8% alcohol and warm. Straight stomach acid. Vile. VILE.
Later we got a pre-pasteurized, pre-bottled dose right from the vat.
I didn’t get a picture of the guy firing the beer right into his mouth from the pigtail. That beer was acceptable. A guy on the tour explained the reason I liked it was because it was near freezing and cold knocks out the effects of tannins. (“Tannins!” I said. “I hate tannins!”) Evidently I’ve been drinking too-warm beers right from the can instead newborn beer suckled from the icy teat.
Fueled by some city loyalty I bought a six pack of AB light cider at the grocery the next day. Blehahahahah. (Shudder.) Still nasty.
5 responses to “Beer”
Ew. They couldn’t serve me beercicles that would be cold enough for me to like beer. Actually I don’t like anything alcoholic much. My palate is trés unsophisticated.
It took a long time for me to even tolerate beer. I think American beer stinks. When I was in Ireland, I feel completely in love with properly drafted Guinness. Impossible to find here because everybody’s in too much of a hurry.
Surprisingly, the big beer in Ireland in 1997-1998 was Bud!I suppose it was just the novelty of drinking piss instead of ale.
Zayrina – Mine too. I wish I liked it, though. Then again, I’d probably get hooked.
Becs- Bud is the biggest beer ever. Bud Light, anyway.
I always thought I hated beer, but it turns out what I hate is warmish beer on its own. Give me a nice icy not-hoppy beer along with some spicy food (even moderately spicy will do) and I love it.
I don’t drink a whole beer fast enough to keep it cold, though, so oftentimes The Fella will split a beer with me, cracking it open and pouring me a small glass to drink with dinner while he drinks the 4/5ths left in the can. By the time I’m ready for another icy beer, so is he.
Elsa – Perhaps I might like the spicy food and beer combo too. I can’t see Gary drinking anything but Bailey’s though.