Saturday, my sister-in-law asked, “What’s Gary getting you for your birthday?”
“Guess,” I said.
“Give me a hint.”
“It’s Gary.”
“Oh! A computer.”
And she was right. Ignore for the moment that we have six computers already, one for me and five (count ’em) five for him. I did not ask for a computer; I asked for a wireless network card. This was so I could take his laptop into the great room and surf and blog without leaving his presence. (It was the Stupid Love Languages book. His Love Language is Quality Wasted Time.) Somehow he jacked that up into a new laptop for admittedly, “us.”
I lost the gift battle long ago. I’ve never liked expensive gifts. Sadly, Gary lives to buy expensive gifts, and he initially gave me jewelry. I was non-plussed. “Oh. What a nice mass-produced gold necklace.”
We reached a compromise, eventually. I said, “Buy me a charm bracelet, then you can add a charm every birthday to commemorate the past year.” Genius Compromise! Give and Take! Hope for the Marriage!
He got me a charm bracelet and my first charm: a dolphin.
“Why a dolphin?” I asked. I assumed since we hadn’t seen any dolphins that year there would be some dolphin connection, like “Surprise! We’re going to Sea World!” or some clever pun, like “You have given my life porpoise!” (which I would have only barely accepted).
“I thought the dolphins were cute! Don’t you like them?”
So, I re-iterated that the charm really should have some relevance to the past year, not some relevance to being the most expensive charm he found in the shortest amount of time. (And I know I sound so ungrateful, but don’t forget this was the year the in-laws gave me deodorant trash bags for Christmas. “They were cute! And on sale!”)
Gary went back to the jewelry store and returned with a more thoughtful charm. I believe it was the Art Palette, fourth from the left below.
So here’s my charm bracelet: a chronology of birthdays, Christmases, and anniversaries over the last 22 years. I don’t think I could list them in chronological order, so here they are left to right. Click the image for immensification.
1. Flag. Christmas 2001, obviously.
2. Candy. Must have been ’94, when we went to England and ate lots of toffee.
3. Teeny Tiny Carnival Destiny. This was the cruise we took and climbed the waterfall. Yeah. That’s probably not going to happen again (the waterfall climb, that is).
4. Artist’s Palette. This was the year I took up watercolors.
5. Fender Guitar. I think Gary held off a year before getting this one. I don’t think he thought the guitar hobby would stick.
6. Eensy Weensy Teapot. Honoring the Yearly Tea. The lid opens! So cunning!
7. London Phone Booth. I was admiring the other side of this at work and discovered the teeny-tiny door opens! And there is a minuscule telephone inside! Eeeeeee!
8. London Bobby Hat. The trip to London extended over several years worth of charms.
9. Locket. This is the locket Gary bought for my 21st birthday. I had actually asked for ANYTHING but a locket. Guess what my maiden name was. Guess how many lockets I already had.
10. Mutt. This was the year we got our first dog, Fred.
11. Drama Mask. A friend started a theater company here in St. Louis and we saw a lot of plays that year.
12. Conga Drum. Technically, this should be two congas, a bongo set, and a five-piece drum kit that sat in the middle of the great room for 18 months. Also knownas “The year of Gary’s mid-life crisis.”
13. A Mouse. This would be … hmmm …. 1987, the year of the great mouse infestation. 31 Mice entered the house, two mice left alive. Then one ran right back in and was promptly killed.
14. Tooth. Got my Wisdom Teeth out that year.
15. Elephants. Crazy. This was a tribute to our visit to Toronto and that insane Animal Park. Seriously, animals climbed all over your car, a bear scratched its back on the station wagon in front of us, it was lunacy.
16. Musical Notes. In which we memorialize the “Let’s Put on a Show!” silent brain lesion that perked up my interest in music.
I’m guessing this year if there are any charms there’ll be a Naked Lady in the box.
13 responses to “Charming (Warning: High Girly Quotient)”
Personally? I’d prefer the computer… but then, I’m a techno-nerd.Be grateful you GET gifts. Hubs either just agrees to let me “get my own”, or he recruits youngest daughter (he calls her my clone because we are so much alike and like the same things and she knows me so well) and gets her to play “Santa’s Elf”…or whatever.
Your bracelet is pretty sweet. Aw. It would be SO AWESOME if Gary got you a charm of a snoot, a Butter Boy or a Butter Girl.
I love the idea of a charm bracelet. My mom had one that marked all of these different phases in her life. She gave it to my daughter. I need to write about that sometime. Lots of good stuff there. 🙂
I still have my mother’s charm bracelet. The charms are huge and there aren’t too many of them. No one wears it.
Sue – Yeah, gifts just make me feel awkward. Still, I’m getting pretty excited about the laptop, now that I’ve thought of a few more uses.Catherine – I IMMEDIATELY looked up “gold snout charm pig” on google.ajooja – That is so sweet. I hope your daughter appreciates it.Friend #3 – Well, why haven’t I seen this? I bet it could be converted to a lovely necklace,as you did with her ring.
My parents bought me a charm bracelet when I was a teen, and I’ve added charms to it throughout the years. I should blog about it! and, yes, be happy Gary buys you gifts. I’m also married to a “you know what you like better than I do” kind of guy.
A few more uses? Coaster? Bug swatter? (Sorry, couldn’t resist).
Melissa – I think the gift that won me over to his way of thinking, the one that made me appreciate his gift-giving, was the forty roses on my fortieth birthday. Actually, come to think of it, that was not as good as the earlier three dozen roses. Because those came to work. And I got to be all, “Oh, doesn’t your husband give you one rose per year? Oh. Well.”Sue – Um, try bed warmer….
So I’ve been thinking about this (yeah, STILL), and I’ve concluded that it would be cool if Gary bought you a charm of a cruise ship to commemorate your BNL trip. That, or a charm of a little foot. You know, for the toe p0rn.
Don’t suppose they have Brazilian wax charms, do they?
Catherine and Meriwether – I will request a little gold foot and a miniature replica of the country of Brazil.
I love your bracelet. My mother bracelet chronicles the events from 1959 through 1972 and my sisters and I can name the meaning behind each one of them. I wish mine had as much meaning. My husband does not understand that i buy items not only for beauty but for meaning and/or uniqueness. For my father I think it is a comfort to him to look at moms charms and remember (now that she is gone after 51 years of marriage)..
Carol – That’s sweet. I need to get some links added to my bracelet so it fits over my chubby hand again.