Category: In Which We Mock Our Employers

It was 65 degrees outside today, which means it was 55 degrees inside of the TeddyJ building. Cold. It was also a week before Memorial Day and white pants one size smaller just came in the mail. Hot. So for the only time ever in history I was the first person to pair a heavy…

Two teams have merged and I have a new co-worker who shares some of my personality traits. She speaks up about the brutal truths. Of course she prefaces them with a prologue about how we’re all working toward the same goal, she means it with the greatest respect, blah, but still the same honesty. We…

Today was another one of our required attendance days at the office. Again, I got to see fifty people in person whom I haven’t been with for ages. It’s usually very gratifying and I feel seen. This time I felt far too seen. All these things are true. Had it stopped there I might have…

The boss asked what I thought was an odd question: “How do I contact someone when all I know is their telephone extension?” I answered that she should dial 1, area code, first three digits of the main number, followed by the extension. ”No,“ a co-worker said, “That won’t work.” This co-worker is my age.…

Bad: Today’s national weather was ice in the south, and eight inches of snow at -4 here in the middle, and similar nastiness up north. This means that Important Work People cannot fly in for an Important Work Conference this week. However, Local Important Work People will attend, so it was all hands on deck…

It occurred to me today that AI was great early on in my work project. It whipped up seventeen case studies in a row, scraped documents to find examples supporting my objectives, cobbled together ways to engage remote students. It was like a devoted new boyfriend. That was months ago, though. You know what AI…

What. The Hell. I again went in to the office, I again looked down at my feet, and I AGAIN saw that my shoes were disintegrating. Not the heels this time. The uppers. Evidently, my lime green sandals are white sandals that WERE coated with suede-like green flocking. They don’t like the office any more…

The best parts of last week’s on-site were the conversations. Team conversation. My six-member work team had a happy hour at Westport Social, a local fun and games establishment. It’s known for a menu of wanton excess. No deep-fried pizza or Oreo fondue, but yeah, things like that. We discussed topics that would be boring…

Well, now I am done with the work event in which attendance is required. Technically, I have the medical excuse that I only had to attend the parts where I felt comfortable that I would not catch something. Well, I went to everything and I caught feelings, as they say. By the end I felt…

Today we start another one of those required-attendance in-office weeks. I have been thinking far too much about what to wear. There have been heavy consultations with my boobs regarding packing them into the pre-pandemic underwire bra. “Nooooooo,” they say, in chorus. “Noooooo. We don’t like bras. And if we have to, we like thr…