Queen Mediocretia of Suburbia

Putting the TMI in absentminded

Month: November 2023

  • Allergist

    When I was 22, Mom took me to an allergist. I had just gotten engaged to Gary, and I guess she wanted to hand me over to him with all my medical difficulties documented and disclosed, as if she was selling a house. “Don’t give her raw egg whites, or the sewer will back up.”…

  • TWIL: Charmin Ruffle Mystery Revealed

    An utterly charming article on Slate about my favorite topic: The Scalloped Charmin Toilet Paper. There’s a reason for the scallops. How I Got to the Bottom of a Vexing Toilet Paper Mystery

  • Gypsum

    Some of the work done in the house involved removing drywall, and Gary is convinced that gypsum particles are still floating in the air weeks later. He can’t sleep in the main bedroom because a ceiling was removed in the main bathroom and he can still feel the particles on his skin. He harrumphs and…

  • Reddit Point of View

    I don’t remember what Google search and Reddit path took me there, but I spent an hour reading a Reddit thread on whether or not men talk about sex when they talk with each other. And, huh, they do NOT. And on the rare occasions one of the pack does, the others say “ew, gross,”…

  • Weekly Paint Progress: 11/16

    Back to basic shapes; this time only a little less basic.

  • Painter Does Me a Solid

    The painter preserved my cutting in. He taped over the cutting in I had done, even. (Probably cost me a grand, but, still, once-in-a-lifetime opportunity.)

  • Compliment Compilation

    I made a special note to compliment Gary this Sunday, and it only took a few hours for him to do something compliment-worthy. He opened a jar that had been locked down with fifteen year old paint. He struggled as much as I did, then he gently tapped it on the counter and it opened…

  • New Paint in Virgin Bathroom

    Well, I picked the paint for the Virgin Unpainted Bathroom, sea foam green, and then Gary nixed it. So I picked some other colors (oddly, all in the Martha Stewart egg family), and I was going to wake Gary up to solicit his opinion, but one color was the clear winner: High Style Beige. Bottom…

  • TWIL: What You Need to Do to Get an RSV Shot

    You need to do these things in this order to get your RSV shot. I believe I might have had RSV once, and it was so miserable that I obediently did all the steps below. Find out if your insurance will pay for it, otherwise it costs $300. Have your doctor send a prescription to…

  • Cat: Issues

    I discovered this week that people with abandonment issues should not have cats. The cat got got nervous when he saw me sit at my computer on Monday morning. “Aha,” he said, “She is typing. The last time she did that those construction men came and made noise. I must hide.” And hide he did,…