I woke up today and Gary was turned around in bed so his head was at my feet.
Later, he explained my snoring was getting to him, and allegedly I also had gas that alternated with the snoring.
“No. I did not.” I said indignantly.
“You did. It was like SNNOOOORRREE pooooott SNOOOORRRRE pooooooot.”
“That’s impossible. Besides, if anyone was doing that it would be you.”
“It’s okay, hon. It wasn’t as loud as the snoring. That was really loud. I just got in the sixty-nine position and then I couldn’t really hear you.”
“Well, it’s better than sending me to the guest room.”
“I told my mom about the sixty-nine position and that’s the only way she sleeps now because Dad’s snore is so bad.”
“Well anything you say is genius to your mom. Wait. What?”
“I told her about how she can sleep in the sixty-“
“You WHAT?”
“Oh, I didn’t put it that way to my MOTHER. She wouldn’t have any idea what that is, anyway.”
“Are you sure? It came out pretty easy just then.”
“No! I said flip around and sleep head to toe.”
(I’ll bet you anything he did say sixty-nine.)
3 responses to “Gary Advises His Mom”
Terry’s snoring used to get to me, but now I’m partially deaf, so it doesn’t seem so bad.
Santa’s snoring could raise the dead. He has sleep apnea and wears a mask at night. The mask stops the snoring but it has a tiny hole would of which blows a steady stream of annoying cold air. So, instead of being kept awake by snoring I get to be kept awake by a hissing in my face. One cannot cover the hole because it is actually CO2 escaping and covered up and left to build up from his re-breathing it would kill him. Never thought of sleeping in the 69 position. I am guessing one or the other would get kicked in the face at some point.
That’s why we sleep in different rooms.
Hattie – The thing is, Gary is a bit deaf, AND he is the one with the deafening snore.
Zayrina – The dog won’t let the litter be broken up, so visits to the guest room are rare.