Queen Mediocretia of Suburbia

Putting the TMI in absentminded

Month: September 2011

  • A Tale of Two Houses

    Mom’s House Mom’s place is finally rented, if still unoccupied. Of course, there was some last minute drama: it didn’t pass inspection the day before the renters wanted to move in. So the property agent rushed through the new firedoor installation, by which I mean she bought it and installed it before taking bids and…

  • Perhaps These Techniques Are Used In Advanced Physical Therapy

    I am so damned sick of my Pelvic Floor Muscles. I never want to do another Kegel. I hope someone tested Dr. Kegel’s pelvic floor strength when he was alive. Digitally. Up the bum. And I hope they did myofascial release on him too. (No. Not really. I worship him.) The thing is, I am…

  • A New Habit

    Gary picked up a new habit during my birthday month. It seems he became addicted to buying me food every day. His diet is Southwestern ranch dip, mushrooms, grape tomatoes, and “lean” BBQ beef chunks from Bandannas. He gets to live vicariously through me by giving me chocolate. Like Chocoholism Syndrome by Proxy. Or, more…

  • Gary’s Nuts

    All of these nuts are on the side table, available to Gary for snacking. I asked why there are multiple copies of each and he said some have the nuts he dislikes picked out. If he looks in and only sees hated nuts he caps it and puts it back down on the table. I…

  • I Interrupt My 9/11 TV Viewing to Write This Post

    Yes, I am spending another 9/11 watching the replay of NBC’s 9/11/01 coverage. I do this every year. This year though, I know why. Answer one is the rational answer: because it was amazing. History. Unfolding right there on my TV. Answer two is the emotional answer: because each year I watch it, I can…

  • A Quick Update

    I don’t exactly break a sweat at Physical Therapy, but somehow it makes me exhausted the rest of the day. But, I must document my success. My resting state is one unit lower. (Unit. What would be the appropriate unit of measure of inner clench strength? One Kegel lower?) A little more stable, as well.…

  • R.I.P. Rescue Me

    I just watched the series finale of Rescue Me. It was just perfect. I think my favorite scene ever was from a few seasons ago. It featured the firefighters down at Ground Zero, just jawing about 9/11, and it turned into the funniest scene of the series. I laughed till I cried. I can’t find…

  • Wild Kingdom, Part 2

    MammalsI dreamed last night that I opened the back door to let the dog in and six groundhogs let themselves in as well. They ignored me when I tried to shoo them off. Just lounged on the floor. I realized today why we have the groundhogs. Last year a neighbor cat sat on the front…

  • Harry Potter and the IMAX 3D Experience

    I just saw the 3-D IMAX Harry Potter movie. I am amazed. I feel like one of those Stone Age tribesmen who is shown a movie and goes into a panic and tries to attack the screen. The closest thing I can compare it to is a living version of this (and I know only…

  • My Disappointing Morning Glories

    For a long time I covered up the neighbor’s chain-link fence with Morning Glories. A fabulous show. Granted, one afternoon I heard a little child ask her Mommy “What are those plants on that lady’s fence?” and Mommy answered “Weeds,” but that sting went away by the next morning. This spring I killed the wee…