Queen Mediocretia of Suburbia

Putting the TMI in absentminded

Month: January 2011

  • In Defense of Milk

    I am astonished to hear some of you speak ill of milk. You suggest milk is the wallpaper of beverages. Here in my part of the Heartland, milk is a staple. For all I know the milk in my glass came from those cows around the corner across from the library. Here’s what else is…

  • A New Tactic

    This has been successful twice now. Step 1. Wait for your husband to yell at you for some minor mistake. a. He must full-on YELL. He can’t be snippy, snide – he must bellow. b. It must be a minor mistake. i. Leave something like a set of keys on the counter. ii. Drink your…

  • Tongue Lashed

    “I really enjoyed our dinner last night, Gary. I hope I didn’t embarrass you too much.” “What, like with your table manners?” (A pause. I hope you all used this pause to think,”Stop talking, Gary.”) I asked, “What’s wrong with my table manners?” “Nothing. It was just an example … Well, except that thing you…

  • Prime 1000

    First: I really enjoyed my meal at Prime 1000, my last stop in the quest for the ideal steak. You might not think so while you read this, because I take a few nauseating turns. The Showme SteakI cornered our waiter early on and pointed to “dry-aged” on the menu. “Is this really dry-aged?” I…

  • More From Mom From Beyond the Grave

    I’m sorting through Mom’s files, separating the wheat from the chaff. Chaff: EVERY receipt for EVERY appliance bought since 1959. Toasters long gone. (Old charge card receipts printed the entire charge card number; that was quaint.) She kept a disturbing number of clippings about MS. Plus many articles about keeping your senses as you grow…

  • 2010 Recap

    My resolutions for 2011 … are you kidding? 2010 was perfect. Why would I change? It was ideal. Perhaps I just have a selective memory. What I Selectively Remember about 2010: TravelI went to Paris… and Louisville, where I stayed at the best hotel in the US… and downtown Saint Louis, where I had a…