Queen Mediocretia of Suburbia

Putting the TMI in absentminded

Month: October 2009

  • Tub

    My new luvvah, Mr. Tubbs.

  • Rolling breakfast

    Eggs benedict 17 bucks:

  • Bruce Hornsby in Saint Louis

    I just bought tickets for the Bruce Hornsby concert at the Pageant in Saint Loiis on 11/19. I had to see what Becs has been going on about! Gary is not going but I got immediate companions from the women at work. They knew about him, I seem to be the only one in the…

  • Leaving Saint Louis

    Eee! Leaving for Las Vegas in less than a day. Gary is laundering ALL of his clothing. “Ellen, I only own jeans, Dockers, golf shirts, t-shirts, and shorts. I need a selection of each for the next four days. So that’s just twenty articles of clothing.” Whereas, as usual, I am packing the bare minimum.…

  • Woof.

    Woof!WOOF! How dare you ignore my demanding bark? Attend to me! Better. This is Mac the dog. Did she even bother to tell you I had surgery? The doctor had to remove a foot boil. And afterward I DIDN’T FEEL WELL AND DIDN’T EAT FOR A WEEK. She didn’t tell you, did she? Because she…

  • Good Job, Everybody!

    I knew you could do it. And congratulations to ANGIE the 100,000th commenter, with “Meh.”

  • List

    Gary just came across my list: Diapers Poise Pads Make dog EAT white bread drink whiskey “Never mind that,” I said, “It’s the stuff I learned about this weekend. For the blog.” What I Learned This Weekend: Diapers Friday, Friend #2 mentioned it’s very difficult to have twins and diaper them alone, because you have…

  • Extolling the Merits of Alcohol

    1. It makes my friends laugh at any stupid thing I say. 2. It cures a bad cough, if only temporarily. 3. It cleans out ones digestion. 4. See number two. I remember the glory days when the active ingredient in Nyquil was alcohol. It tasted better than what I’m currently using: half Scrumpy, half…

  • Yet Another Neurological Humiliation

    Went to the Newrologist today. He was putting me through the heel-to-toe tests, and asked me,“Go to that back wall and walk toward me on your heels.”As I got close to him he said, “Go back and do it on your toes.”I teetered on my heels a moment. I heard Paul McCartney belt “No one…

  • Weirdest Dream Ever

    Gary has the Simultaneous PukeCoughPee Virus now, only his pee has farther to travel and, as you know, he pukes only once a decade. One distinguishing characteristic of the Virus is, I surmise, that you breathe very shallowly when you sleep so not to cough, this starves your brain of oxygen and you have insanely…