Given what I did on July Fourth (stayed in the house, saw no fireworks, learned a schtckle of Yiddish), and given what my summer plans are (concert next week, then a great expanse of nothing), I am reduced to updating old reports.
Rock Band– I was momentarily interested in getting Rock Band, or at least Guitar Hero, then I realized that I already play a similar game called Guitar Pro. Have you heard of it? You sit on the side of the bed with your guitar, and rock song tabs scroll past you on the screen like the bouncing ball, and you try to keep up. I suck at it. I honestly contented myself yesterday by playing only the notes on the low E with my acoustic.
Metal Dog– Mac continues to seek and destroy all our zipper pulls. We are going to rent him out to the TSA so he can search out box cutters and knives.
Moneymoneymoney, Money– It’s easy to want stuff when you can’t afford it. Let’s say you want a huge flat screen TV. The thought process is: “Want! Can’t afford.” and it ends there. I have found that when you can afford it, the process is: “Want! Won’t fit in entertainment center. Still want! Buy new furniture! What to do with old furniture? Move old furniture! Will expose dog pee stains on hardwood floor! Refinish floor! Move all existing furniture! Pain in the ass! Don’t want big screen tv!” I’ve talked myself out of everything I want.
Butterflies – You raise monarch butterflies on milkweed plants. This monarch company makes you grow a milkweed plant first. I can’t. I am going to have to buy a milkweed plant. I CAN’T GROW A WEED.
2 responses to “Old Posts: Where Are They Now Edition”
Placate your inner gardener by calling it a butterfly bush or a swan plant, as we do here. It’s worth it – the monarch chrysalis is a beautiful thing.I like your trail of reasoning – mine begin more prosaically (ie not set off by a rush of money, more by not being able to open a door any more, for example). I once very logically proved that I couldn’t paint a window frame because my tame mechanic was on holiday in Fiji.
Big Dot – By I CAN’T GROW A WEED, I did not mean I can not bring myself to grow a weed. I mean I’ve tried and I can’t grow it. And I want details of your trail of reasoning that ends in Fuji.