Queen Mediocretia of Suburbia

Putting the TMI in absentminded

Month: February 2024

  • Weekly Paint Progress: 2/29

    This week the Tongue went from this: … to this.

  • I Have Sucessfully Raised a Husband

    I know that you, as parents, are all so proud when your children graduate, or move out, or get married. Soon I too will have successfully taken my charge past a milestone as well. In less than a month, Gary will turn 70 years old. I raised him all the way to 70. Or, as…

  • One Silver Lining to Gary and the Dust and the Allergens

    The dust has resulted in a positive. Gary claims that the allergens and dust rain down upon him from the ceiling as he sleeps, so he, delicate princess that he is, has taken to wearing his long-sleeved business shirts to bed. You cannot imagine how sexy it is. Ladies, gentlemen, I strongly advise this look…

  • Gary and the Dust and the Allergens

    I know, you’re sick of it, but I don’t know what to do. Gary will not shut up about the dust and the allergens. “Oh God, Gary, please just shut up about the dust. If it’s not the dust, it’s the allergens. Stop it.” “I CAN TALK ABOUT WHAT I WANT IN MY OWN HOUSE.”…

  • TWIL: What a Colossal Pain Probate Is

    Last week someone at the Department of Transportation said all I needed to get ownership of David’s car was the title, a notarized form saying I own it, and a death certificate. She sounded knowledgable. When I returned an equally knowledgable person said, no, you need an “Odiedo” form filled out by the local Police…

  • Mom at My Age

    I recently looked at my bullfrog wattle and I realized I now have Mom’s chin when she was 59. This was Mom’s life at the age I am now: 61. She had spent years supporting / spoiling a non-working husband who stayed up all night and slept all day. I’m there too. Her bladder decided…

  • Cat Does Cat Moves

    It delights us when Goldie the cat does the classic cat moves, like when he sits on the window sill Halloween style. Lately he’s branched out into classic cat bathroom behaviors. I can’t get him to lap up water as it’s coming out of the faucet, but one day we arrived home to find that…

  • Weekly Paint Progress: 2/22/2024

    This week the AI Tongue went from this: … to this.

  • Daffodil Day 2024

    When we moved here in 1988, we planted daffodils. They’d be up every year by February 28th. Last year’s daffodil was up on Feb 18th. This little guy was up Feb 20th, perhaps earlier. Hardier varieties? Global warming? Today’s forecast is for a ridiculous 68F degrees (20C).

  • Rewriting the Novel: Fresh Eyes

    I think — with all the rearranging and rethinking — that it’s been at least a year that I’ve read the novel from start to finish. Oh my lord, people. So, so bad. Forget Anne Lamott and her “shitty first draft. ” I’ve got a “shitty fifth draft. “ And it’s obvious stuff. The first…