Queen Mediocretia of Suburbia

Putting the TMI in absentminded

Month: April 2019

  • Improvement: Backyard

    In addition to the impending improvements in the side yard, the backyard needs so much work I cannot even begin to think about it. I only know one thing: the patio has dropped six inches and that is exposing the dining room subfloor to the elements. That’s the only known thing. The rest of the…

  • Improvement: Side Yard

    We are staying close to home again this vacation season, so that means we will again invest in home improvements instead of memories. The driveway absolutely needs to be resurfaced or replaced, and if I put in a large, slow-growing evergreen, a mugo pine perhaps, the front bed will be done. The side yard and…

  • Cleaning Regimen

    My cleaning regimen is that I clean when people are coming over. There was a brief episode last week when we thought the tax preparer was coming by and I hurriedly cleaned the public spaces: the guest bathroom and the great room. However, yesterday I was in the non-guest bathroom, shaving my feet, as I…

  • Mick Jagger

    Mick Jagger thanked the staff at the hospital following his emergency heart valve replacement. I suspect this was Mick’s first time in the hospital. He seems very healthy for an old man. In fact, all The Rolling Stones seem oddly healthy. When I imagine myself in a rock band (and you know I do), I…

  • Killer Software

    This Boeing air disaster story is just a nightmare. Now it seems that Boeing was warned about the software problems four days before the most recent crash. I feel like I dodged a bullet. Boeing (nee McDonnell-Douglas) is one of the biggest employers in Saint Louis. I don’t work for Boeing, but I do write…

  • Banana Hanger

    Gary brought home a kitchen banana hanger. He hasn’t had a banana for months, but he explained, “IT HAD A MONKEY ON IT,” so what can you do? He also brought home bananas, so I embraced the banana hanger, if it gets him to eat bananas. But then, what happens when the bananas are gone?…

  • Sweater

    I spied a young thin woman at work wearing a very eye-catching asymmetrical sweater. It had ME written all over it. (Or rather, unabridged, it had LOOK AT ME written all over it. The fringe, the asymmetry, the cowl neck were all designed to grab attention.) I complimented her, and immediately stalked that sweater online.…

  • Trivia: Bad

    What was bad about 90’s trivia? Two words: Free. Beer. That may sound great, in general, but free beer served to competitive people? Bound to get rowdy. In fact I did see two adult men in superhero costumes literally swatting each other, and it seemed all in fun, but one foul slap and it’s kindling…

  • Trivia: Good

    The usual team of friends went to a ‘90’s trivia match. Costume: (If you don’t know, Saint Louis trivia matches expect you to dress up in harmony with the trivia theme.) I intended to go as Madonna, I still have my costume saved from back in the days when Madonna and her yearly metamorphosis made…

  • April 1

    Today is April Fool’s Day. Trust no one. I feel a bit that the Internet has ruined April Fool’s day. Before the internet, if NPR would tuck a facetious story in with the rest of Morning Edition, it was delightful. It was a special treat you only got on one day of the year, and…