Queen Mediocretia of Suburbia

Putting the TMI in absentminded

Month: August 2013

  • To My surprise I find I know all of Sammy Hagars songs

  • Weather.com knows

  • Sudden thunderstorm at Sammy Hagar concert in Maryland heights

  • Oh! Vivid Menopause Dreams? No One Told Me About That.

    No estrogen for a week and I am imagining every menopausal symptom and adding some undocumented ones. Are strange dreams a symptom of the ‘Pause? In the last few days I have had both the best dream and the worst dream I’ve ever had. The Best Dream Paul McCartney was using The Bookmobile as his…

  • Wedding Gifts

    Earlier this month I used a tension rod to fix a broken cabinet, and if you were wondering what was trapped in my Cabinet of Dr. Caligari, it was a pizza pan wedding gift. After I rescued it, I started wondering what other wedding gifts I still have 28 years later. Pizza pan, painted metal,…

  • Juicy Piggies

    Two years ago the USDA lowered pork cooking temperatures to 145, 15 degrees lower than I’ve ever seen, and NO ONE TOLD ME. Bring on the trichinosis: I like juicy pork. Now that I know, I just made the best pork roast of all time. It wasn’t a bit pink, even at 145, and I’ve…

  • Like the Universe, I Am Becoming Less Dense

    In addition to my user-friendly “Your breasts are normal” mammogram letter, I also saw the cold doctor-to-doctor mammogram report. “The present examination has been compared to prior imaging studies performed at Barnes Jewish Hospital on 06/18/2009, 10/09/2006 and 09/28/2006. The breasts are almost entirely fat.” Harsh! “Doctor, I need a consult. Have you ever seen…

  • I’ve Got the Wonky Lung

    Let’s get this straight. I do NOT have shortness of breath. I can breathe, sustain life, I’m all pink, I have no complaints about that. What I HAVE is a constant need to yawn without the capacity to yawn successfully. I don’t know what this is called. Yawnus Interruptus? It happened ten years ago right…

  • Star Wars

    We just watched The People vs George Lucas, a delightful documentary about the hatred George Lucas stirred up by a) revising the original Star Wars and b) making the prequels be inferior to Episodes 3-6. Most important, it taught me why people have t-shirts that say “Han Shot First.” I had no idea Han was…

  • Bullets on a Saturday