Queen Mediocretia of Suburbia

Putting the TMI in absentminded

Month: September 2009

  • You snoozed! You loosed!

    Did you know there are nice scalpers who will buy your unused tickets? And even volunter to find you a nice gentleman to use the seat. I am here at Pi, president Obamas favorite eatery.

  • OUT OF DATE:Rachel from the cruise

    Contact metweet lnschmidt or comment hereI am unpopular and ticket is going to wasteLet me know if you have a friend who wantts it Nope nevrr mind but I’ll be looking for you . I’ll try to have my hair the right way so you can recognize me.

  • Plans, I have Plans Damnit!

    Thursday Night: We* go see Mike Birbiglia. I caught the last half hour of Mike Birbiglia’s special on Comedy Central a few months ago, googled him (to be honest, I binged him), and found he was coming to town and he sleepwalks!. Hey! I’ve sleepwalked too. FRIENDS for LIFE. Tickets bought within moments. Well marketed,…

  • Doom and Gloom? Pros and Cons?

    What’s your opinion on doom and gloom? I don’t like them: not doom nor gloom. Gary, however, is a big fan. It’s part of his planning process. Last week: “Hon, it looks like we may not be able to go to Las Vegas.” “No … perhaps it looks like you may not be able to…

  • Photo of Mom

    This is currently my favorite photo of Mom: It was taken the Christmas after she got polio. I don’t know what she was actually looking at, but it certainly seems she’s looking at her future. Some days I look at her and she seems resigned but heroic: some days she looks pissed. “Bring it, future,”…

  • Many Moods of Gary

    The Drama Tsunami Two nights ago Gary conducted a symphony of drama. It began at 3 a.m. He woke me up with some quick-paced muttering about dog pee. “Dog! Pee! Pee here! Augh! Pee there! Augh! Pee, pee, pee.” Then, slower and louder shouting directed at the still-sleeping me, regarding how if I weren’t sick…

  • Plans and Schemes

    A few times in the year before she died, Mom would alert me that she was “up to something.” Often, she wasn’t actually up to doing something, but she was up to making plans. Plans for capers. Plans to steal the neighbors’ non-ironic pink flamingos. Once, she whispered, “plans to move the furniture.” “Whoa! That…

  • Not Eating

    For the last few days, here is what I’ve had to eat: Half a frozen pizza Steak n shake cheeseburger and fries Ted Drewes chocolate frozen custard from your grocer’s freezer Chocolate babka Watermelon When I was a child and sick, this is what I would have had to eat: Chicken bouillon Beef bouillon Chicken…

  • TV Gary Hates

    In 1985, the year Gary and I were married, a television show named Moonlighting premiered. It starred Cybill Shepherd and Bruce Willis. Look – Bruce Willis with hair. It never made it to syndication, so you might never have seen it. It was very quick-paced and quick-witted. They did entire shows in iambic pentameter. There…

  • Babka? Codeine?

    I choose codeine. That’s how sick I am.